What Happened?

Thu, 08 Dec 2011 09:08:00 -0500

I must be bored out of my wits to actually make this blog post a reality. But hey, it is good to do something new once in a while.

So it all started when I graduated from university, with all the hopes on absolutely nothing I know of — the exact same plan I had before entering college. I did not know what god knows what I should be doing with my life. Fortunately I had friends who helped me a.) choose a course and b.) get a decent starting job. So lo and behold, right after graduation, I find myself thrown into the industry of making … stuff.

And there, I benefited quite a lot from it. The cash, the knowledge, the style, the exposure! I started to fully value things that I did not back in the university. It felt awesome and it was like everything I wanted! Until (there’s always an “until”; there wouldn’t be a story without one!), I started to think, “what’s next for me?” that’s when I realized that…

… I’m f*cked …

After working from the company, I had absolutely nowhere to go; and when I say nowhere, I meant it. Now I see my friend (and co-worker at the same time), learn all sorts of things — mostly for mobile; and I start to see all the options that he has now, not to mention the regret because I did not have the determination (and intellect) to do so. On the other hand, there I was knowing only to do just one thing and nothing more. No one could tell how f*cked I would be in the future until, you know, they were in my shoes. But sadly, they are not. So I’m stuck with just sucking it up for myself.

Wait wait, back up. Why worry about such thing?”, you might ask. Take this: I graduated focusing on the wrong skill sets.

So, I say to myself, “Why not just learn something new?” If only things were as easy as that. But yes, I did try to learn something new — note the word “try”. Tried to learn this, and tried to learn that. I even went as far as trying to improve my current skills. However, with nary a book, an exercise, and a toy project, I’m going to go nowhere with what I’m learning! Not to mention after everyday, I am so mentally tired that all that I want is just to chill and ignore all else.

So yes, I get all this complicated stuff going on inside my head each time I ask that question: “What’s next for me?” It was not that complicated back then. What happened? Over-thinking? Egotistic Pressure attacks?

I do not know, must have Leveled Up! or something in life probably since shit just got deeper and things just got more complicated.

livingwinds

What Happened?